Out of the Gray
by Blackrock Soldier
Summary: Two secluded spacemen find reason to run away. Sjips. Xephin. / Yogscast fic.


Out in the deep dark of space, we knew nothing about the world outside our shell of a spaceship. Engineered to obey and listen to what we were told, we never wanted to know. Never cared. Spending our days twisting to the machine, we eased the pain by sticking together. Or at least, I liked to think so.

But I was always a bit behind him in all honesty. While he liked to tinker and learn as much as possible, I just sat back and watched. Watching him take anything and make it something more blew my easily impressed mind. From faulty ship parts to his own ship, there was nothing too complicated for him until he realized the complication within himself. Soon, there would be nothing left to learn. Inside the shell of our spaceship, his knowledge would come to a standstill, and yet, he learned to fix that too.

Everyone was meant to be asleep, but he was wide awake; eyes glued to a device that I still don't know the name of. In the dead of night, my eyes were glued to the out of place satisfaction on his face. He had received a message. A message that there was another planet out there with new and exciting things to discover, and even though no one was ever supposed to leave, he decided right then and there to go without even a second thought.

I followed after him but only to say goodbye. Staying behind once again. There was no way I could just leave like him and he understood that. He didn't ask me to come or even care if I did, but as the engine of his ship started, he made me promise that I come find him if I ever had the gall to leave. It would take a year after watching him fly away, that I would realize I'd actually keep that promise.

Nothing had really changed. I had taken the heat of his sudden departure and suffered some penalties for letting him go, but surprisingly it wasn't as severe as I thought it would have been. A couple slaps to the wrist and life returned to the mundane and clockwork way it had always been with no complaints from me. Still, forgetting about him was impossible and eventually I too decided to leave.

No one tried to stop me. My theory is that it didn't matter. There were trillions of "cogs" like me spawned everyday, and even though I had been smacked around for letting him go before, it was just a simple measure to keep us in line. To not lose more than they could manufacture. Of course, that theory may have been just that because I knew I was alive and whether or not I had ever pursued it, I had freedom. I had always been more than an empty piece and I think he had realized that a long time ago too.

Chasing his trail through the void of nothingness, my eyes were graced with the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. A planet so blue and green that I was reminded that those colors actually existed. That they had always existed. Even while we were trapped in the darkest spaces.

Touching down, and stepping out, I felt the grass beneath my feet and looked into the clear blue sky. The sweet air filled my lungs as I breathed it in and turned to see a huge door worked into the side of a cliffside. The word 'Yoglabs' was written in the center which seemed even more garish than the actual door, but out in the middle of nowhere, it didn't seem like it mattered. Built by him, he just made something ridiculous as always where he could be himself. Where I could easily find him.

Walking down the colored hallways, and past many, many empty rooms, he spoke to me like we never spent a year apart. Honestly, I preferred it. To hear him the same as always made me happy, but it also meant he was as bit condescending as always. "You know, I actually forgot I made you promise me that, and to be honest, If I didn't know you I would have never let you stay. Much less, let you in."

"Lucky me," I said sarcastically, grinning happily, "I missed you too."

"…All I ask is that you mind your business. Don't go anywhere you shouldn't."

"Why?"

"Because I shouldn't have to explain anything to you."

As I looked up at him,he looked back at me with complete seriousness. It wasn't like I would say no. I respected him enough to mind my own business. At least, I would try to mind it as long as possible. "I wouldn't ask you to."

"Good." Stepping forward without looking back, he left me standing there with only a couple words left hanging in the air "Then we understand each other once again."

Wandering the halls alone, I did just as he asked and kept to myself; mostly spending a lot of time at the break room trying to get the coffee machine working. There was always something wrong. Always something broken. Nothing ever worked how it should, but It seemed he liked it that way for whatever reason.

Though many rooms were indeed empty, even more of them were filled with fascinating things. From a BBQ room that puzzled me to Holodecks that could create anything I could want, it was all so him. Creating… Reinventing… Changing. Such a grand and wonderful place. For a while, everything had me caught up. All of it distracted me enough to ignore the way he refused to be in the same place as I was. It was painfully obvious he was hiding something… or someone. Still, I never noticed. Or at least, I pretended not to. It was only after the wonder wore off, did I see finally see it.

Days passed. The things I had once been obsessed with grew dull and boring. Creeping around, I decided I wouldn't ignore my curiosity anymore as I slipped past no entry signs and glanced over my shoulder to make sure no one saw. His voice kept resonating in my ear, and I may have felt a bit bad, but It's not like I actually promised him. Even if I found something I couldn't explain, as long as he never found out I broke his trust, it wouldn't matter. In and out would be enough.

Now… Now I almost wish I had just minded my own business, but maybe that would have been worse. Hearing a voice cut through the silence that grew louder as I went further, I began to realize how familiar it was. It was too low to make out anything that was being said, but as I ignored everything I passed, I came across the balcony that looked over everything. All the Cloning Vats that were foreign to me and full of people I didn't know.

A light traveled from the ceiling; powering one of the Vats, and as I slowly moved to look over and try to understand what I was seeing, I saw Xephos standing before it speaking as if someone was listening. From where I stood, I could just barely make out the name on the plate and the man inside as I read it out to myself: "Honey… Dew?"

For a moment, I just stood completely confused. All that time I had just seen my old friend wandering the halls alone, but hidden below inside a shell of ice was someone else. Someone who he obviously cared deeply for. Someone who he didn't want me to see. There was something wrong. He had endured a tragedy long before I showed up. Very aware of his trust threatening to break, I turned away in fear and in hopes that maybe somehow I could forget. It wasn't my business and it never would be, but I…

Running back from where I came, the things I ignored began standing out to me. Signs labelled with scary titles. Secrets hidden from the eyes of those who should never see them. A giant glass window hiding a man who looked at me from the other side, but it wasn't a man with a ginger beard and soft expression. No, it was someone very different. Someone else who banged on his prison to get my attention and who made me stop to help him.

Though I was the alien between us, he looked completely different from everyone I've ever seen. Skin so gray and an expression that was defiant yet sad, I was cautious as I moved towards him, "Hello…"

"Are you like that fuppin clean cut bastard? You look just like him."

"No, I um… We're from the same place, but we are two different individuals."

"Hm…," He studied me from top to bottom as I looked up from where I came to see if we were still alone before turning back to him, "You do seem less… hostile."

"Well, I'm not gonna torture you any more than he already has. Why are you in here anyway?"

The look he gave me was unimpressed, like I should have already known, "Isn't it obvious? Just look at me."

I was, but apparently not close enough, "I don't…"

"My skin, you dumb dumb. I'm gray. I'm bland. I… apparently I make him sick. I don't understand it, but I'm not wanted here, and in his anger, he locked me away."

"I see." Beginning to put things together, I did understand. " He and I… we grew up in a very strict and feeble place. Escaping from there to here, I'm sure we both had a similar reaction to this new world around us. There's vibrance. We can breathe. And yet, it seems that he hasn't changed. Or rather, he's so free now that his infinite thirst for knowledge has corrupted him. He created all this, used coloured lines to connect it all, and forgot that colorless walls had surrounded him until you came along. "

"But it's not my fault. I was just looking for somewhere safe."

"You're right. It's not your fault. There's something wrong with him. I mean… Just now, I saw-"

"So, you're not…" He interrupted me even though he hadn't put his words together yet, "You're not disgusted by me?"

Losing what I was gonna say, I nodded, "Of course not. The colors of this planet are so full of variety, but there's something very calming and peaceful about gray. It's… nice to look at."

His cheeks grew red as he looked away from me. Looking back from where I came, I made the decision to myself that staying there really wasn't the best choice. What I had witnessed only minutes ago, the man trapped in glass, and the eery feeling that crept up my spine was enough to turn back to promise him we'd both get out, but that one glance away from the door would be a mistake.

"I really thought you understood me, Sjin, but even my own kin has betrayed me."

That voice caused the hairs on my body to stand up and an icy chill ran down my spine as our eyes met and I could clearly see the anger in his as he stood in the doorway. For a moment, I was speechless. The trust between us had shattered into a million pieces, and before I could even react, he had his hand wrapped around my throat; spitting angry words at me, "I trusted you. I allowed you to stay here, and what do I find? You and that… that thing flirting with each other."

Through the choking and the fear, Somehow I managed to find my voice, "You've… lost your mind, Xephos…"

"The only thing I've lost is any need for you. This is MY lab. This is MY home. And you DARE wander it without my permission. You DARE talk as if you know everything. You don't fucking know anything! You never have!"

My vision was fading and I was losing consciousness, but struggling to look at the pale mans scared expression, I knew it would be up to me to save us both. I had already promised him, and there was no way in hell that I would allow it to end so prematurely. Looking back at the man who used to be my friend, I saw nothing more than a frightened child trying to hold on to his secret that I had found out. A critical thing that would surely send him to hysterics. Bracing myself, I managed to say it just before darkness completely took me, "I know about the man in ice… Who is he, Xephos? Who's Honeydew?"

It was like he had been struck by lightning; looking at me with so much shock that there would be no recovery, but the pain I waited and braced for never came as he dropped me. Heaving and catching my breath, I almost didn't catch his frightening expression as he said in the coldest and most bizarre way, "Get the fuck out. Get the fuck out of here, and never come back."

"Xephos…"

"You and that damn pale skin. If I ever see you again, I will kill you on sight. Get. The. Fuck. Out."

The fear resurfaced. In his eyes, I saw all the anger in the universe swirling in them. The cord I hit had been the loudest and the deepest, but shaking, I managed to get us both out of there with him glaring daggers. Even though I was afraid. Even though I was being crushed in his grip, I couldn't help feeling I had been the one at fault for what I had said. He was right that I knew nothing, and though two lives have been spared, one had been pushed further into insanity. So much further, that I couldn't help wishing that I would someday wake up to see the gray walls of that spaceship and the flashing lights of some contraption he had managed to put together in the dead of night.


End file.
